1. |
Drowning Feelings
05:18
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I never felt so lost until that morning when I awoke with no one here,
the strangest thing about it all is I felt it ended there,
I missed the smell upon my bed sheets the touch of your gentle skin but were not here,
and you do not care.
As morning light rises you were out drowning yourself,
was there something I said, do you hate me,
or is it that theres someone else?
As the liquor slowly empties from my glass,
I start to think that life’s too much of a task,
I accept that I’m a burden,
I awake with the pain of failure
that I’m no longer good enough for anyone
I never thought reality could feel so cold,
my true happiness has been taken away,
and its safe to say that I no longer feel secure in my own skin.
I fight a constant battle of drink and death,
the angst that floods through me,
I just need a place to hang my fucking head.
So now I’m just drowning the feelings
the visions that we once shared,
I’m afraid to say that its not helped at all
but I'm still try to numb the pain
I looked at you as my saviour the one person who gave me direction,
now I’m left alone feeling empty with a heart full of rejection.
How can someone you loved be treat this way,
how can you look someone else in the eyes and feel the same.
Its clear now we weren’t meant to be,
but it shows enough now i’ve lost everything.
The memories we once etched in the back of our mind will slowly wither away,
as I continue to destroy myself and attempt to rid this ache.
So now I’m just drowning the feelings
the visions that we once shared,
I’m afraid to say thats its not helped at all
but I'm still try to numb the pain.
Trying to numb the pain
I’m drowning the feelings
and trying to numb this pain
when
you
stare
into that bottle
what is
it
that you see?
Because i know the vision you’re seeing
is no longer with me.
I never felt so lost until this morning
when I awoke with nothing left,
the hardest thing about it all is that I never did my best,
Do you miss the smell on your bed sheets?
The times that we once shared just now I’m not there,
because you did not care,
you never fucking cared.
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2. |
Living In Fear
03:55
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Years have passed, a difficult and depressing life he's lived
he found that comfort in drink, as he drowned the feelings
angry, distressed and some, as death pucks on his heart’s strings
drunken and missing past loves as he carries the weight of torment
head back, down that liquor, slams the glass as he heads to the streets
he’s stumbling now all the way back home, as blurred lights carry the way
his feet drag to the door, his fist bangs on the glass
what happened to that man that she had once loved?
I never understood how things were back then
I was just a kid (I was just a kid)
How could you hold his hand after all he did?
I never come to terms how you’ve done this for so long
(for so long)
Why is this something that you are used too?
How can speak the words ('I love you’)
Because I know your stressed
and I know you’re scared my dear
But what do you call life
when you’re living in fear
Because I know your stressed
and I know you’re scared my dear
But what do you call life
when you’re living in fear
He stumbles in, his wife's alone and hiding from him again
she hears the words that he is slurring, he must be drunk again
because that dirty old bastard has got her scared
with those haunting paces he moves up the stairs
getting closer now she convinces herself
‘its just that's drink talking’
clutching at straws she grips her rosary beads
as she prays to her lord ‘Let him leave me be'
as all hope is lost, her lord was never there
his fist grips her hair
the sheer terror staring back at him.
the loving eyes that have faded and dimmed
through all the years of pain and despair
oh dear god, why didn’t you answer her fucking prayer
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3. |
Dissipation
02:22
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So now,
I've been drowning the feelings
(The visions that we once shared, I'm trying to numb this pain)
Trying to numb this pain
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4. |
Purity
04:12
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She was just a girl, barely age thirteen
so much beauty so much heart and her eyes just gleamed
you’d never think that her life would go wrong simultaneously
but that was all due to changed that one crucial evening
on her way home, that brisk winters night
she left the school gates, alone with no one in sight
she tried call her mother, just a short time before
but her mother was too busy she didn’t answer the phone
So that young girl began to walk the streets (carelessly)
the same streets drug dealers and addicts, (wander endlessly)
as her heart began to race, she had to swallow her worry
(butterflies in her stomach), she headed home in a hurry
‘don’t ever walk alone in the night’ (that’s what her parents always forbid)
the one phase they always said (because you’re never alone on these streets kid)
you’re never alone on these streets kid
Just about 10 minutes from where she called her home
in the corner of her eye a group of men had been stalking her
she began to pace deserted streets through back alleys to get herself free
but they was always behind, it's just a matter of time
She was just a girl, barely age thirteen
so much beauty so much heart and her eyes just gleamed
you’d never think that her life would go wrong simultaneously
but that was all due to changed that one crucial evening
Evening
How could someone do this to you my dear
her face covered with dirt as she screamed with fear,
but these men didn’t care they let her voice ring out
“I just want out, please someone help”
once they’d had their way, they left her in the alley bloodied, brittle and fray
they took her life away that day
One week on her parents had noticed a change
loud music on repeat, she’d locked herself away
but what her parents did not know
she was about to hang the rope
she took her life away that day
they took her life away that day
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5. |
Life In Black
05:09
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Dear darling, its been so many years since we put you in the ground
the sound of the soil hitting your coffin still haunts me
I can’t seem to kick the drink just yet but I’m still trying just for you
and every time I walk the corridor I notice the room without you
I know what I’m saying is far too late
but I need that someone to listen, I needed you speak too
it seems life has taken its toll on me and I’ve taken it out on you
so I’m sorry for all my selfishness and the pain I have put you through
I lay flowers on your gravestone every time we meet
that lump in my throat tightens as i struggle to speak.
So now I’m left to face my demons, my life in black
The ghost of you still screaming out, (my life in black)
(Where have you been all of these years?)
I’ve been wasting away
I lost track of my fucking sanity
(Where have you been all of these years?)
I’ve been destroying myself
I lost the care for my own fucking well being
Although our lives seemed so distant and the drink had tore us apart
I just want you know that I’m with you, and you’ll always be in my heart
it should be you who is looking over me, you deserve to be here today
but instead I’m looking over you, It should be me in that fucking grave.
And my heart aches, because I’ve been lying to myself
I let my life in black consume me
disregarding everyone else
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Far From Home Sheffield, UK
Melodic Hardcore from Sheffield, UK. Life In Black now available on all music platforms
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